Saturday, November 22, 2008

Fowl Play


After officially "pardoning" a turkey, something that just about every executive branch politician does at this time of the year, Palin gets interviewed at a turkey farm while a couple of less fortunate birds get "processed" in the background (video below).

I know Alaskans are probably more used to this sort of thing than us city folk, but didn't it occur to Palin, her handlers, or whoever is working the camera that maybe they should frame the f'n shot 10 feet over?

Even the guy using the turkey cone (yes, that's what it's called) seems taken aback.

BTW, here's a quick description of how to use the contraption from Blue Oak Ranch Pastured Poultry. Bon Appetite!:

The first turkey goes into the killing cone headfirst. Catch and handle your birds gently and calmly, and there will be less stress (for both you and the bird!). Restrain them by holding the shanks, and try to avoid rough handling.

The first cut to sever the jugular vein and carotid artery are made just behind the tendon attachment for the beak and tongue. You can feel the hard cartilaginous piece behind the jaw attachment and ear canal.

Make sure you have absolutely sharp knives for this process. The sharper the knife, the cleaner the cut and the bird will bleed out faster and more completely.

After the bird is in the cone, pull its head out by the lower beak and hold it firmly. Your thumb should be able to sit firmly in the "V" of the beak and your forefinger should hold the jaw firmly on the inside. Yes, the bird will try to close its beak; and no, it won't really hurt you...

...Be prepared to deal with the blood, which will flow over your hands and even squirt out the side of the neck, if you only nick the carotid artery instead of severing it.

...Cut deeply behind the jaw, pressing firmly with your knife while using a slicing motion. Cut down and toward the front of the neck, traveling under the jaw. Still holding the lower beak firmly with your thumb, cut the other side of the neck in the same location behind the jaw to sever the opposite blood vessel.


Lauren Wissot said...

This Thanksgiving I'm thankful that I've been a vegetarian for the past two decades.

Matt Maul said...

I'm a vegetarian like Toula's parents in My Big Fat Greek Wedding. I only eat lamb ;)