Oscar Report

I didn't see all of the Academy Awards, but I'll offer my opinion anyway...

I watched the beginning and the end. I caught some of the middle as I channel surfed back and forth during commercial breaks between "Patton", "Battlestar Galactica", and "Tora, Tora, Tora."

1. From what I saw, I thought Ellen DeGeneres was a fine host. I've never been a big Billy Crystal fan. Chris Rock and Jon Stewart were mediocre. Then again, my favorite host was David Letterman, so what do I know?
   
   
2. The only Liberal "moment" I'll whine about is the Al Gore love-in. First, apparently no one in Hollywood can get over the 2000 election (Gore lost - move on). Second, does anyone outside the entertainment industry think Al Gore should run again?
   
   
3. As usual, the broadcast was was wayyyy too long (four hours). The show planners face the same dilemma that the NFL has to contend with over the Super Bowl half-time show -- do you design it for the people in the seats OR the people at home? What works for one doesn't work for the other.
   
   But, if they really tried, the Academy could get the show down to around 2 hours (or so) by not wasting time on nonsense.
   
   First off, lose all the musical numbers.
   
   Second, allot each of the 25 awards 3 minutes. Give the presenters 45 seconds to read the nominees then announce the winner. Give the winners 2 minutes and 15 seconds to walk up, accept the award, and read their bleeding-heart milquetoast speech. Period.
   
   That's break down into:
   - 75 mins for awards.
   - 25 mins for commercials
   - 20-30 mins to divide up for whatever "special" stuff they want to do
   
   I'll bet the ratings would improve.
   
   
4. I found Jerry Seinfeld's movie theatre riff funny and ironic. His comments about the "overpriced, oversized" pop-corn and candy got big laughs. My guess is that this audience hasn't bought snacks in a theatre in YEARS. Also, selling "overpriced" amenities is how theatres break even due to the "overblown" costs of the film industry. Like I said, ironic.
   
   
5. Finally, I think the "fix" was in for Martin Scorsese. Wasn't it too coincidental that he got his award from his old buddies Francis Ford Coppola, George Lucas and Steven Spielberg? I was happy for him, but I haven't seen "The Departed" yet, so I'm not sure if it was worthy effort or just a make-good for previous slights (I hated "The Aviator" and "Gangs of New York").